Skiba Rives

skibalovesya @ 2009-09-26T22:31:00

2009-09-27T02:33:04Z

... So my dad calls me up as I'm doing my laundry.

He proceeds to tell me that both of my grandparents on his side are dying, my Nana of a metastasized melanoma in her lungs and spine, and my Papa of progressive supranuclear palsy.

Wonderful way to start the coming week. :/

Makin' babies~

2009-09-26T20:02:37Z

It seems like everyone has been making babies lately. I know too many people who have gotten pregnant recently (too many young people that is) and had babies, and it's like, why is everyone having babies?!

In other news... I'm lonely, and bored! Everybody left! The place is vacant!

You can only hit F5 on a website for so long before you're like, "Okay, I'm done."

Maybe I can read my books? Maybe? Or play a game. I sort of want to play Pokemon FRLG but I don't have a game I can erase.

I had soy milk at breakfast today. It was yummy, except it wasn't cold enough. It's cool that Thomson is now offering it though. Breakfast was good, got a very large helping of eggs from the lady who is nice and not like "YOU THINK I GOT MORE EGGS?!" ... Oh, dude, I still have that banana in the fridge! Wonder if it's fully ripe yet...

My journal entries are so schizophrenic. XD

skibalovesya @ 2009-09-25T19:34:00

2009-09-25T23:37:44Z

Ah, today...

Katy came down the other night and we were finally able to play more of Ashley's campaign. GIANT DAGRON FIGHT. Amazingness. I rather enjoyed myself, except I found myself unable to fall asleep... likely due to the amount of coffee I had, 'cept I was tired and just couldn't fall asleep.

That, however, kind of messed with my emotions, and I had one of my occasional bouts of intense sadness. I started sleeping it off, but I didn't really feel much better until...~

MY LIGHTSABER ARRIVED.

Oh yes. Ohhhhh yes. Got a lightsaber! And a Sith one, too. :3

So that kind of made my day a whole lot better. I got shot down in both my classes by my professors, but I'm pretty sure they didn't intend it the way they made it seem, so it doesn't bother me too much. Now I'm just fooling around on Facebook and PsyPets trying to figure out what to do with the rest of the night. I'm not looking forward to this weekend much, really... Maybe if I wind up resetting my sleep schedule, I'll feel better...

Oh, and I'm so asking my friend Taylor to put a sound system in my lightsaber so it'll make all the fancy sounds that accompany a lightsaber. Fuuuuuun times! :D

skibalovesya @ 2009-09-25T06:14:00

2009-09-25T10:16:03Z

Jesus fucking Christ, I haven't updated in ever.

Maybe it was tonight when my friend Josh mentioned he had a blog, and I was like, shit, I have a LiveJournal I NEVER USE. So I spent this morning going through all my old entries, and...

I was a whiny fucking emo kid for a while.

How come no one smacked me back then? I seriously needed it.

I'm glad my life has really turned around. I'm surrounded by wonderful people every day. My roommate is a really amazing person, my boyfriends (:D) are the sweetest, and everyone is just amazing here at Winthrop.

Dear LJ, I'm going to update you more often because I kind of miss telling you my everyday stories.

Sometime this weekend, I'll post a ginormous entry about everything that's happened between now and my last actual entry. So much. Soooo muuuuch.

Josh, if you're reading this (as I instructed you, haha), ignore my whiny bouts from way back when. Lotsa shit went down in my past but I'm over it now.

Let the fun (re-)begin!

skibalovesya @ 2009-06-14T04:58:00

2009-06-14T11:02:49Z

It's time to talk about something really interesting! Introducing to you, Skiba's favorite fics~!

I have a binder IRL that currently contained exactly six fanfics. Out of the literal thousands of fics I have read, only those that make it into my binder qualify as my absolute favorites, without which I would probably die. The reason I printed them out and stuffed them in this binder is that if I were ever to lose internet, or if the fics were taken down or deleted, I would have a permanent copy of them.

Several fics that also count as my favorites, however, are not in this binder -- YET. The reason is for pure length, as two of the fics I count as my favorites are both almost 30 chapters each. That's a lot of fucking paper.

Also, one author of my fics, the amazing americanleaguer has so many amazing fics that I found it near-impossible to choose a favorite of hers, so I just picked the one I seemed to re-read most. It was a difficult decision, but one I'm (at least currently) satisfied with.

Without further ado, and in no particular order!:

-Darkness Drowning by Ghost Helwig (Fandom: Fruits Basket, R, Tragedy/Romance, yaoi, rape, death)-

This fic impresses me in many, many ways. I read it before I had a full grasp of Fruits Basket (I think I only had read up to book 3 by that time), yet I felt that I was able to understand the characters thoroughly. The fic itself is based on a dream that GhostHelwig had, one that I'm sure she was able to describe vividly to us in her fic.

A crazed Akito has captured several members of the Sohma family who fraternized often with Tohru. He tortures them, makes Haru rape Yuki, then kills Yuki, Kyou, and finally Tohru, who, in a stunning show of IC-ness, forgives him for his trespass. Ayame comes and saves them (or what's left of them) by killing Akito himself, and stating that Tohru defied him, even in death.

On first reading it, I was captivated, fascinated by its delightful show of in-character interaction, despite the heavy tragic angst that pervaded it. I'm not one who's turned away by dark themes, in fact, I rather enjoy them, and this was perfectly dark without being overly heavy-handed. The fic itself played out like an actual chapter from the manga, when it sheds its sugary shoujo and delves into the realm of Yuki and Akito's relationship. Tohru's brief but nonetheless important appearance in the fic is a focal point, one that makes me smile sadly whenever I read the words "I forgive you." All in all, a fantastic fic which I recommend to any fan of Furuba who doesn't mind a little angst in their fics.

-Decay by Rangel (Fandom: Bright Eyes, Brand New, Taking Back Sunday, R, Angst, slash, death)-

Every time I read this fic, I shiver. Delightfully dark and angsty, with a psychotic Adam Lazzara out to reclaim his ex-boyfriend Conor Oberst from the hands of Jesse Lacey. This fic plays on a brilliant use of pronouns, with "I" referring to Adam, "you" referring to Conor, and "he" referring to Jesse. A familiarity with Conor is played upon as Adam searches out Jesse, a distant "him," by essentially breaking into Conor's house and luring Jesse out.

Reading this, I could feel under my skin the lurking insanity and instability of Adam in this fic. His poetic stream-of-consciousness, his hard-focused emphasis on little details, and his pure and utter loathing of Jesse; it's brilliant, really, much like the colorful and realistic dialogue. Conor is a brief, wispy figure, in between this power struggle that Adam has with Jesse. Jesse has what he wants, and Adam needs Conor. He loves him so, it's an obsession, and he just wants Jesse gone.

Gone, another word that's played with. Adam uses metaphor to describe a lot of his own thoughts and actions, adding a layer of depth to a story with little (almost no) background. I like it that way, though, it's a tiny window into a dark world overlaid with gray and blue and brown. For three emo bands into one fic, it certainly comes off as the darkest and most emo thing I'd read in a while. If you like a dark oneshot, you'll certainly enjoy this one.

-i could hide out under there [i just made you say underwear] by unloveablehand (Fandom: American Idol, Cake (Chris Richardson and Blake Lewis), hard R to NC-17, humor, slash, bodyswap) (You will need to be a member of cakeforever to read this!)-

Finally, away from the dark and into the light. Bodyswap is a funny thing, and an especially hard thing to write and not come across as cliche or a Freaky Friday ripoff. unloveablehand, however, succeeds incredibly at writing this, thus marking my favorite Cakefic ever. The adorable and believable characterizations make me chuckle and grin every time I re-read this fic, from Chris's quiet freaking out and total embarrassment to Blake's amusing lack of a brain-to-mouth filter and ridiculous antics.

Essentially, Chris wakes up to find he has swapped bodies with Blake, and the two devise a way to not only hide the fact that it happened (albeit unsuccessfully, because that's how they are), and figure out a way to change back. Blake, on another one of his great adventures, suggests that they have sex. Chris is positively mortified, but also a little disappointed -- he wants Blake to be interested in him, which seems hard to do when Blake is acting both narcissistic and adventurous. Hilarity ensues, along with an interesting and mindfucking sex scene that made my inner eye's depiction of the fic go absolutely nuts.

This fic also made me like Gina, and I fucking hate Gina. The supporting ensemble, however brief their appearances are, are like the little spices that add to the fic. Chris Sligh is his normal, self-parodying self, and Gina serves as an impetus to aid Chris-as-Blake in his dire situation. Her interaction with him also sets in the reader's mind that in this universe, bodyswaps are not completely unheard of, which is a tasty morsel of realism to an otherwise (wonderfully) cracked-out fic. Read this if you love AI and Cake, it's a must-read.

-Man Overboard by elizabethisboss (Fandom: Blink 182, R, angst, slash)-

At the time of this fic's release, Blink 182 was still broken up, and some bad attitude was being expressed between Mark and Tom. There was a despair hanging in the air about Blink in general, that it was a problem that could never be rectified, that it was something no one could do anything about. Luckily, the future turned out bright on our behalf, but the fics that were written during that "indefinite hiatus" were some of the best, in my opinion. *is reminded of "The Future with the Lights On" and smiles faintly*

Mark has been debating whether or not to visit Tom, the heaviness of the decision weighing on him until he just plain can't take it. He almost unwillingly tracks Tom down, sees the change in him, and they suddenly start having a conversation like old times. The old times and new times intersperse, Tom regressing every so often and Mark reacting in ways he didn't think he would, or should. The two wind up in bed together, like it was implied they used to, and the next morning, Mark leaves, and in a symbolic gesture, burns the scrap of paper with Tom's new number on it -- he'll never visit again.

This fic flows with a varying sense of both languidness and urgency, a rollercoaster of emotion if I ever I read one. I typically frown upon the use of capitals for emphasis, but it fits so well in the context of Mark's self-rants. Every time Tom changes moods, the fic lifts, like, could it be true, could they really go back? But then everything crashes as Mark believes, no, there's no way it can't, and the two clash until someone gives up. This pattern recurs several times until the two are just fed up with it, and the next morning, Mark just leaves it all behind without looking back. A perfect fic for its time, a real emphasis on the fandom's general angst, a fic I believe is as close to that reality as it could get.

-Within Reason by mahpantsaregone (Fandom: Psych, PG, gen, fluff, family)-

If you are at all familiar with Psych (and I am, for seasons 1 and 2), then you know what everyone knows: Shawn has daddy issues. Shawn and Henry's relationship is one that seriously, on the second to last episode of season 2, brought tears to my eyes. It reminds me a lot of my relationship with my own father, and this fic was like the closure I think both Shawn and I desperately needed.

Henry discovers Shawn playing poker with himself on Henry's porch, and invites him in for tea. There's some adorable Shawn-being-Shawn, hilariously in-character, until Henry pressures him to get to the point. The two play poker with the stakes being Shawn telling Henry why he came there, and Henry doing what Shawn asks of him. As it turns out... all Shawn wanted was a hug. And he gets what he asked for. :3

I connected deeply with this fic, and I think I cried a little while reading it. Shawn's humorless laugh, his "You never touch me," and the general feeling that Shawn experiences the whole time -- he hides behind his humor, like a finely tuned shield, until he just can't take it anymore and bursts. Henry, in a rare moment of consideration, actually bends to Shawn's will, gives him the love he never, ever relents. And it makes my heart all fluffy and rainbow glittery. Read this if you want some heart-warming Spencer family time. ♥

-champagne in your eyes by americanleaguer (Fandom: Baseball, Red Sox, NC-17, PWP)-

Of all the fics of AL's I could've chosen, I went with the shameless PWP. Why? Because it's amazing. In my opinion, americanleaguer can do no wrong with fic. If I wasn't so deadset on "favorite means ONE THING ONLY," I think I'd be listing her fic masterlist here and not just this one fic. But seriously. This fic takes PWP and turns it on its head, not just paragraphs of graphic sex, but a perfect characterization of just what Red Sox clincher celebration is all about.

It's just after the winning game before the 2008 post-season and Jonathan Papelbon is on top of the fucking world. In the mess of champagne that is the clubhouse after a serious win, he sees Jacoby Ellsbury, and he simply wants. So he drags him into Tito's office and fucks his brains out. Delicious imagery, AL uses her expansive vocabulary to create a vibrant scene that you can see, hear, smell, feel, and, most importantly, taste. I may not like champagne, but this fic makes it sound awfully delicious; in fact, the fic is like champagne itself: sweet on your tongue, sharp and vividly flavored, crisp, clean, delicious.

There really isn't anything better than this. Every brief cameo is just so spot-on, that the words "quietly disbelieving" are now synonymous with "Jason Bay" in my head. Every bit of this is lovely, expounding on those postgame videos that I tracked down and love so much. And I can't not pimp americanleaguer, she's my all-time favorite writer of fic ever. So go, go, go, read her stuff, now! Recommended for any Sox slash fan, READ IT NOW.

-Through a Glass, Darkly by valkyrie-alex (Fandom: Static Shock, PG-13 to R, Adventure/Romance, slash, alternate universe)-

Take Static Shock, turn it on its head, throw in some awesome OCs and twist up the actual characters, and you have Through a Glass, Darkly, the most epic fic in the history of fic. So epic, in fact, that it's currently unfinished, despite almost 800 reviews that probably are begging "MOAR MOAR MOAR." I don't think I've read something quite as amazing as this, one that kept me on the edge of my seat through 29 chapters and gave me one of hell of a sleepless night. If they EVER make a Static Shock movie, it had BETTER be this fic!

Static and Gear are chasing a bang baby that appears to have the ability to jump through three-dimensional space. An accident with Static's electricity causes the two of them (and the bang baby) to get flung into an alternate universe where Static went evil and Richie is dead. The two are separated, Richie captured by evil!Static, and good!Static (usually referred to as Virgil, to avoid confusion) has to convince the good undergrounders (some of which were bad in the original universe) to trust him and help get Richie back.

What a thrill ride this fic is. I couldn't take my eyes off of it, and I've re-read it so many times I've lost count. Trust a sixth-grade English teacher to be this good at writing, it's just plain amazing. A realistic alternate version of Static Shock is presented to us through the eyes of the good guys, without abandoning concepts of the show: Yes, the Justice League exists, but it's just one town in America, they have universal threats to deal with; Ebon packed his bags and left once he realized Static was more evil than he was; and Sharon just wants her baby brother back to how he used to be. The OCs are perfect fits in the world they live in, without crazy exaggerations of their powers, and the flipping back and forth between POVs means the moment you start to think, "I want to know what [other character] is doing!", it switches. READ THIS FIC. NAO. Especially if you love Static Shock!!!

-The Mistakes We Make by anax aka Kinslayer (Fandom: Digimon Adventure 02, NC-17+ (there is no rating to suit this fic), Angst/Drama, yaoi, graphic torture, rape, mindfuckery)-

Do not read this if you are of the faint of heart. I mean it. This is fic put me in a funk for two days after reading it. I think I became clinically depressed during those two days, the impact of this fic was so strong on me. I was compelled to read it because the ship_manifesto on Daisuke/Ken suggested it, with appropriate warnings. But I'm a sucker for intense darkfic, and this satisfied my every need.

The Digimon Kaiser (the Digimon Emperor to you dub people) captures Daisuke (Davis), and throughout the course of 18 chapters, makes Daisuke completely dependent on his very existence. There is much graphic rape and torture, psychological warping, just pure dark. And just because there's all that doesn't mean the other, even minor, characters aren't important. In fact, Veemon and Wormmon are as integral to the plot as the Kaiser and Daisuke are; I wept for Veemon, and Wormmon is just... what a Chosen Child he has to deal with. I can't even begin to think of what to say about Daisuke, and the Kaiser is all kinds of sick and fucked up.

This fic will take your emotions, rip them out of your heart and soul, crush them into a thousand tiny pieces, and then rub your raw emotional wounds in the powder. But you'll enjoy every step of it if you're as into dark shit as I am. This fic may be proof that I'm more insane than I give myself credit for being, but I can't help it -- it was beautifully, if tragically, written, and some day when I have the time to be depressed, I'll re-read it. Read at your own discretion, it's fucking intense.

-Electra in Kokomo by anonymous (Fandom: Phoenix Wright, Apollo Justice, R, Angst/Romance, het, technical incest)-

Another totally epic and awesome and amazing fic. One that made me actually like het for once. I despise het with a total fervent passion, yet this fic captivates me. Phoenix/Trucy is a pairing that has always intrigued me, because I always wondered what adopted children think of their adoptive parents. Like Freya in Chobits, who fell in love with her "father" despite having no relation to him and the strain on her circuits essentially killed her.

One night after a particularly good show by magician-in-training Trucy, she convinces Phoenix to let her drink. One drink leads to three and more, and soon, some hands end up where they shouldn't. After a brief sexual interaction, the following days, months, years, bring together a culmination of a relationship built on frequent bouts of lust, complete and utter secrecy, and a father-daughter interaction that is purely Phoenix and Trucy. This is their thing, it's how they are, and it's just so perfect in every way, even with its bittersweet ending.

I love this. Plain and simple. I can't stop reading it over and over, it just has me in every way. I wish the author would come out so I could thank him/her for such a wonderful fic. My mind has been forever changed, with this actual good het. I mean. Wow. Me, enjoy het? IMPOSSIBLE. Hah. This fic is just that amazing.

And thus ends my list. Hope you enjoyed the ones I call my favorites.

If any of you authors are reading this, I LOVE YOUR FICS HOLY CRAP.

For those who didn't make the list, don't despair! I love all the fics I read, so don't feel left out. I was never insincere about saying I liked your fic. ♥

skibalovesya @ 2009-06-13T18:44:00

2009-06-13T22:48:14Z

Yanked a meme from americanleaguer, and it came out totally awesome.

1. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Special:Random
The first article title on the page is the name of your band.

2. http://www.quotationspage.com/random.php3
The last four words of the very last quote is the title of your album.

3. http://www.flickr.com/explore/interesting/7days/
The third picture, no matter what it is, will be your album cover.

4. Use your graphics program of choice to throw them together, and post it in your own journal.

And here's what happened:

Kickass.

Writer's Block: It Sounds Better When You Say It

2009-06-12T09:23:00Z

No matter what language you speak, you've probably come across words or phrases in another language that sound better than their equivalents in your native tongue. What's your favorite word or phrase in a foreign language?

View 507 Answers

Mine's not so much a word but a phrase that I've been using since the dawn of time (or when I started making original characters, which has been like my entire life). The phrase is particular is "hikari no yami," which translates roughly to "Darkness of the Light" (or "Light's Darkness" but I prefer the other way around)

It's Japanese, yeah, I know, cliche, but the phrase has a distinct meaning for me in that it's the one theme that echoes through all my original stories. One character is usually the dark spot in a world otherwise known for its "light," or the perfection that all others see in it. The character that is the darkness usually questions the light and is viewed by others as being wrong or evil. I'm not sure why I like the switched connotation so much, but I like to change things up in that respect.

._.;;

skibalovesya @ 2009-03-24T07:23:00

2009-03-24T11:45:01Z

Well hello thar LiveJournal. Good to see you again.

*stares blankly*

Though I doubt anyone at all reads this, I do realize it's been for-freaking-ever since I updated.

Let's see, changes...

1. I go to college now. Yay.
2. I'm polyamorous now. Yay?
3. I'm blonde! ...Yay???

Yeah, that last one... I took a chance. XD;; Changes are it'll end up either pink or black (again), because really, I don't look good blonde.

As for college. Wow. I met some damn awesome people.
- Ashley, who is an amazing little girl ;3 (WHO IS ALSO A MANIACAL OVERLORD MUAHAHAHA)
- Katy, Ashley's roommate, who is Broadway material and the kindest person I've met in a long time
- Will, their friend and constant companion, who is well-read and incredibly intelligent
- Leigh Ann, an eccentric but overall entertaining person to be around (with excellent fashion sense)
- Lynn, Leigh Ann's roommate and a sweet, ray-of-sunshine girl who always has something nice to say about everyone
- Martha, Leigh Ann's friend from home who also goes here and is quite similar to me in a few aspects
- Stephen, my new male best friend who is a little mousey who draws awesomeness
- Christiaan (with two a's!), Stephen's really, really, REALLY chill roommate
- Lauren, my roommate with a quirky collection of movies and books
- Madi, a collection of pure awesomeness who knows how to have a good time XD
- Brock, a dude I want to be around all the damn time because he's black and likes punk rock music and anime! AND IS BISEXUAL~!!!
- Sam, the man who introduced to me to a game called Dreamfall (which I need to play more of)

And so many acquaintances that I can't even name because you'd be reading this post for hours~!

There are two other important people I need to mention, both of whom I met thanks to Stephen.

His best friend from home is a kid named Josh, another furry who happens to be an otter, and a huge Sonic fan. He's loud and brash, but he can be exceptionally kind (when he wants to be). If you're not ready for him, he can take a lot out of you, but just remember, you have to shout back. :D

And of course... Chris. My other boyfriend, basically.* He's about 6'3", with about 2 or 3 feet of jet black hair, gorgeous hazel eyes, and a dual loud/quiet personality. Around Josh, and when he's feeling strongly about something, he speaks well above the recommended amount of decibels. But when he's quiet... it's peaceful. He knows how to make me smile, laugh, enjoy myself, and I love spending time with him. He's introduced me to many amazing video games, and even made me like some that I wasn't particularly thrilled with originally.

Among the new games I've accumulated a love for, they are:
- Makai Senki Disgaea, a strategy RPG with a lovable cast of characters
- Klonoa, a platformer with an adorable plot and squishy cute furry things
- FFX, oddly, but the only reason I haven't played that is because I would have preferred to play all the Final Fantasies in order...
- Ragnarok Online, which is LOVE
- Eversion, a strange homebrew platformer with some... questionable Satanic content XD
- Star Ocean: Till the End of Time, another amazing RPG with a beautifully and intricately detailed world

I've also met a few of Chris's friends, such as Chad, Cody, Cobun, Mitch, and even Chris's (good?) twin. XD;;;;

It's been a ride, these past few months. Had my ups and downs, and some pretty intense stuff has happened. Overall though, I'm feeling incredibly satisfied with how everything is unfolding as of late. I love the people I'm around, I have fun on a daily basis (and we all love to get together to play Dungeons and Dragons at least once, if not twice, a week).

*As for the "other" boyfriend business, let me tell you right now, I am not giving up on, nor am I cheating on, Brandon. We have a very open relationship, and seeing as he is away overseas, we have agreed that while he is away, meaning not visiting MA or SC, we are both allowed to see other people so long as our feelings toward one another do not change. I feel very strongly about Brandon, and I love him very, very, VERY much. I say I'm polyamorous because I truly am; I can love multiple people at once. You know how you can love your parents and siblings, or your own children, equally? I can do that with people I'm not related to. I love them both... but eventually, I'm probably going to end up with just Brandon. I can see myself with him in the future.

Anyways. That's what I've been up to these past few months. I've also been writing and drawing... I got a Fur Affinity account to see if I can garner more pageviews. Still, you all know me, I'm no fur. There's just been loads of furry influence around me lately, and, well, it's hard to ignore. XD I wrote some new fics, and my latest endeavor will be a very detailed Disgaea doujinshi.

Farewell for now... would love to hear from anyone reading this, really. :3

skibalovesya @ 2008-06-22T12:29:00

2008-06-22T16:30:32Z

I fucking hate thank you notes.

skibalovesya @ 2008-05-15T22:16:00

2008-05-16T02:21:09Z

"I lay with Cassio lately, and being troubled with a raging tooth I could not sleep. There are a kind of men so loose of soul that in their sleeps will mutter their affairs. One of this kind is Cassio. In sleep I heard him say 'Sweet Desdemona, let us be wary, let us hide our loves.' And then, sir, would he gripe and wring my hand, cry 'O sweet creature!' then kiss me hard, as if he plucked up kisses by the roots that grew upon my lips; then laid his leg o'er my thigh, and sighed, and kissed, and then cried 'Cursèd fate that gave thee to the Moor!'"

*coughcough*

We're reading Othello in English class.

Iago is gay for Cassio.

I rest my case.

skibalovesya @ 2008-03-03T19:21:00

2008-03-04T00:28:56Z

I was going through my buddy list today when I was reminded of something that happened to me not too long ago.

Sometimes I search for people I used to be acquainted with, particularly on the internet. I saw so many screen names, so many people I used to talk to, that I no longer do. There have been times I've tried to find someone I know only to find they've disappeared without a trace, or have become someone that I no longer recognize.

Facebook has helped me contact a few people for the first time in forever, but it's still not enough.

I decided, then, to make myself a promise.

No matter what, I will always remain available to those who want to reach me. I will always be available through AIM, through email, at this LiveJournal, and on Facebook in person.

Though I have moved many times, gone through many screen names, personas, assumed names, and the like, I will never be unreachable. So many times have been hurt to find the people I once considered friends have vanished into thin air. I vow never to be one of them.

Here are the names I have assumed sometime in the past, including screen names:

Skiba Rives / skibalovesya
Mewgar / Mewgar 2 / Mewgaramon
Tikku77 and a half / Tikku77+1/2
whereisyourboytonight? / subpoprecords
Krawling Darkness
Toxicity1771
billaybillaybill
Smut Silveria
badcheeseyoueat
xXxgrayeyesxXx

I will always be within reach.

I promise.

skibalovesya @ 2008-01-23T20:53:00

2008-01-24T01:53:15Z

Brandon's going to Iraq in August.

... Fuck.

skibalovesya @ 2007-12-18T06:31:00

2007-12-18T11:31:49Z

I FOUND MY HAT! :D

skibalovesya @ 2007-11-28T16:00:00

2007-11-28T21:53:02Z

So I had gym today. The fact itself isn't really an issue -- I don't really mind gym this year. However, few of the kids in it are my closer friends. Point being, we played basketball today -- me, Kate, Kate's sister, Aaron, the kid with the curly hair (forgive me, I'm bad with names, and you don't get introduced much in gym anyway), the kid with the glasses, and a certain guy named Nick.

Now, Kate's a good friend of mine, and I'm reasonably friendly with her sister and Aaron. KwCH I barely know but see a lot... I think... and KwG holds a friendly air towards me.

Nick, however... this is where things get iffy.

We were walking over to the hoop (going at a fairly leisurely pace), which gave us time to toss the basketball amongst ourselves. I tossed it toward Nick, who was about a foot away from me and looking straight at me, expecting him to catch it and toss it too. However... he smacked the ball away, causing it to hit me right on the cheek, knocking my jaw and rattling my head enough to give me a low-grade headache. Kate, naturally, did that freaking-out-laughing-OMG-I-CAN'T-BELIEVE-YOU-JUST-DID-THAT thing that people do when stuff like this happens and exclaimed, "You just hit her in the face, man!"

Nick merely gave me a nonchalant look with a half-assed "Sorry," continuing about his business without a second thought.

I took that in a moment. He just cracked me in the side of the face with a fucking basketball, and that's all he does? Says he's "sorry" while quite obviously not meaning it then walking away? I know I get the "I don't like you" vibe from him, even if most people dismiss his behavior by saying that's just how he is... but things went downhill from there.

Basically, we were just tossing the ball to each other in crazy ways, then shooting (or trying to shoot and failing miserably). At the time, I wasn't particularly keen on participating as much as everyone else, as I 1) suck unbelievably at it and 2) was headachy, completely exhausted from an hour's rest, and, oh yeah, I just got hit in the face with a basketball. I wasn't interfering with everyone else's fun, though, but I have to admit I mentioned my lack of sleep and complained a little -- but keep in mind, most of the time I'm just thinking (or in this case, complaining) out loud when I do that. I did throw a few times, but most of the time I watched everyone else's antics from the sidelines.

Again, things continued to go downhill. Nick was enjoying himself, laughing with everyone who goes, making his typical "lighthearted" snide remarks, and even shouting for people to watch out when our ball went astray. However, after continually jumping in front of me to catch the ball when it was headed for me (with my intent to catch it and maybe shoot), I pointed it out only to do just that: point it out.

"You keep jumpin' in front of meee..." I said, using a tone of voice I reserve for occasions when someone's doing something I don't particularly like, but it doesn't bother me -- I even added in a little grin for good measure, hoping to make it clear that I wasn't trying to put him down.

Instead of grinning back or even making some kind of comment about it, Nick just gave me a half-lidded stare and held out the basketball like it was the last thing he wanted to do. I shook my head, saying, "Nah, I was just pointin' it out, go ahead," gesturing for him to shoot while continuing to smile at him. He then shoved the ball into my hands, muttered, "You gonna go or what?" and started to turn away. I held it out and tried to roll it back into his hands, again saying, "No, really, you can go." He made no effort to try and catch it, though, just watching it as it rolled out of my hands, off his arm, and onto the floor. He stared at the ball as it rolled off, then looked at me like I was the scum of the universe.

Then someone else got the ball and he was back to being Mr. Sunshine.

The whole situation just enforced what I'd thought -- my "I don't like you" vibe doesn't lie, it seems. Though in past experiences, I got the vibe only after the person had gotten to know me. This, however, was straight from the beginning. I attempted to subvert it on numerous occasions by being as friendly as possible, playing along his same vibe of humor (including humoring him frequently), and attempting to add to the conversation in hopes of hearing what he had to say. The entire time, I felt like he was just "tolerating" me -- like I was bothering him in some way, but he put up with it anyway.

While I'd normally say "fuck that, he's not worth my time," two things in particular stand out about this. One, he barely knows me -- the vibe was there since we first met. He's really got no reason for that, as I feel I've been nothing but nice to him; I'm never outwardly mean to anyone unless I inadvertently upset them with something I do or say, and even then, I meant no harm. He's also the type to say when someone or something is bugging him, so that he didn't say anything to indicate something I did or said was bothering him led me to believe things were fine. Two, however, I think he's really funny, extremely witty, and in a way mildly attractive. He's just one of those people I'd like to be friends with because I value what they say and generally enjoy their presence. He's admitted to being somewhat self-absorbed, so I would think that the attention would be pleasing, if not flattering, for someone like him -- by this I mean, it would make him happy.

Today, however... it really struck a chord in me. That anyone I would consider neutral on the "liking me" scale would react that way after accidentally hurting me I find not only insulting, but upsetting and hurtful. He didn't even give an "are you okay?" like most people say whenever anyone gets hurt, even to people they don't even know. And to just give me a dirty look when I was actually offering to let him play more, with my participation playing no part in anything concerning him... it stung.

I'm basically confused and hurt by the entire thing. It wouldn't be so bad if he actually presented me with a good reason, like most people who don't like me do, but so far, he hasn't. So I can't understand why he'd act like that.

Frankly, I'd be upset if anyone hurt me accidentally and didn't give a meaningful apology.

Sure, I can chalk it up to "Oh, that's just Nick," but in the end it doesn't make any sense to me at all.

skibalovesya @ 2007-11-13T17:11:00

2007-11-13T22:11:42Z

Okay, someone wanna be my friend and help me out?

I keep seeing it all the time but I don't know how to say it!!

MEME. Is it "mehm" or "meem" or "mee-mee" or what?!

skibalovesya @ 2007-11-03T13:01:00

2007-11-03T17:33:02Z

Oh man. I just woke up from one pretty fucking bizarre dream. It was a three-parter (maybe four, I have a feeling I don't remember one), two of which were House-related, and one of which was Psych-related.

The first part had to do mostly with Cameron. I don't remember a lot of it, but I do know that she and possibly Chase and Foreman accidentally got into some pretty nasty hallucigens, and started having these bizarre visions. Cameron was kind of wandering through the hospital as these bookshelves were rising out of the floor, and she starts looking through them. One rises to her left, and out of surprise, she knocks a lot of them to the ground. She sort of mumbled, "Oh, oops, better put these back," and as she's doing that, one rises to her right, effectively trapping her with the walls of shelves. She notices this and starts freaking out, screaming and banging on the wood. Outside the hallucination, House is watching her half-unconscious body writhe and realizes she's really having something scary going on in her head. In her hallucination, she sees him knock down the shelf and run to her and shake her, all wordlessly. She then wakes up and just hugs him, and he's like, "Um, please stop."

The second part switched over to Psych. Somehow, two things were already established in my dream setting: The first is that Shawn had died a little over a year beforehand, and second, he had a niece of about 17 years of age. It started with Gus walking the street looking pretty bummed out (probably stlil over Shawn's death), and he notices Shawn's niece coming up. They started talking when Gus notices something really strange about one of the houses. The door was wide open, so the two of them, feeling a little curious, start going up the steps. Inside is like, huge. There're dark floorboards and a set of stairs going up the right wall to a hallway going around three of the walls in the room whose floors extended over the room below, and whose walls were just a short run of cast iron bars. On the other side of the room was a sliding door leading outside. Gus and Shawn's niece went nearer to that door, while the camera kind of switched to show Shawn, more or less a spirit, leaning over the bars upstairs and watching them go by. He closes his eyes and fades out. The camera then switched back to Gus and Shawn's niece, outside, looking up and down the porch. There's an older man sitting in a rocking chair down the far right, and he notices them. "Ah. Burton Guster and Shawn Spencer, I presume." Gus starts and looks at Shawn's niece, who strangely enough has turned into Shawn. He gapes. "But how the hell...? Shawn, you're dead!" Shawn laughs at him and pokes him in the chest. "You thought you could be rid of me that easily?" The old man starts explaining that even though Shawn had died, his spirit just wouldn't give up, and now his niece could serve as a willing and aware vessel through which he could temporarily return to the world of the living, if only to solve cases. Shawn and Gus look at each other, grin, thank the old guy, and run off to return to the Santa Barbara police station to pick up where they left off.

The third part I wasn't able to finish because a stupid headache woke me up. For the first part, I was out of "TV land" and was actually sitting in the living room of my old house, watching TV. They were showing the preview for the next episode of House, which was basically Chase (with weird longer hair) getting bitter about the way Cameron and Foreman were treated and started to build this... I dunno, weird box thing and there were these strange gusts of wind that would suddenly rear up out of nowhere and suck a person into the box presumably forever, sort of a manifestation of Chase's anger. However, the box grew out of control, and whenever there was the slightest bit of wind, it would just grab a person and suck them in. The preview ended with Chase pulling these... well, they looked like really big laundry detergent dispensers... around him and thinking, "How am I going to get rid of that thing?" I got up to get something but when I came back, the stupid cable box had frozen with some retarded error message, but the sound of the next episode of House was already coming through. Pissed that I had missed some of the beginning and would be unable to rewind it on DVR, I shut the box off and turned it back on to see House and Chase walking down someone's walkway in heavy winter coats. House was saying something to him that ended with a bizarre, "Well... I'm superstitious," a wink, and he walked away, leaving Chase sort of staring at him. It then switched to Chase and Foreman hanging out on the front steps of the same house, looking up at what looked like a water tower. Foreman rolls his eyes as Chase was talking about some kind of urban legend regarding the tower. The next couple of parts get really... out of physics. There were these two kids hanging out there too, and the father was doing yardwork or something, when suddenly a rather large tree falls... for like, absolutely no reason... on top of one of the kids. Chase and Foreman immediately get up to do something about it... but for some reason, Chase is like, "WE NEED A HOSE!" so the father gets him the hose from the "water tower", which starts spitting out this weird yellowy-white stuff. Chase comments like, "This is the strangest water I've ever seen!" and Foreman laughs and says, "Water? That 'water tower' you were talking about actually holds sodium hydroxide heavily diluted with water, you idiot!" Meanwhile, the kid is safe and wondering what it was they pelted him with (which was gathered in a big puddle on the ground and looked like gross clam chowder...), and Foreman explains that it was low grade sodium hydroxide. Chase starts and says, "Wait a minute, isn't that bleach?" and Foreman glares at him like, "That's why it was diluted with water! Otherwise," and he turns back to the kids, "it would've burned your skin." The last thing I saw was Chase getting started on the box while Wilson was looking at him and asking, "What are you building?" to which Chase says, "Oh, just a box..."

Then I woke up with a seriously painful headache, had some Cinnamon Toast Crunch, and wrote this entry! :D

skibalovesya @ 2007-10-19T23:26:00

2007-10-20T03:27:53Z

Man, I love casual Friday. Tight-fitting jeans, adorable t-shirts, devil-may-care attitude in general... *shudders with excitement*

I need to find better things to do in A Block study...

skibalovesya @ 2007-10-13T19:55:00

2007-10-13T23:56:16Z

Is it wrong that I laugh every time I hear the words "bacon cheeseburger" ever since the first day of Government?

*roffles*

skibalovesya @ 2007-10-13T02:53:00

2007-10-13T06:53:51Z

About six hours ago, a CD got stuck in my CD drive. I tapped eject like five times and nothing happened.

The CD just popped out now.

wtf.

skibalovesya @ 2007-09-26T22:17:00

2007-09-27T02:23:42Z

Why is Government so full of squee?

Again, another amusing anecdote (ALLITERATION FTW) occurred today.

I don't remember how it began, but we got our essays back in class (I got a 95, fwee), and later on, Mr. Bertrand had been reading George Washington's farewell address to make a point about political parties, and he made sure to tell us that it was written in a confusing manner because, at that time, English was very, very confusing. The word 'usurp' was involved, and he commented on how the word is rarely used. We all made various points on the use of the word. He goes on to say something to the effect of...

"...and in Danielle's essay, not to call you out or anything, she used the word 'disadvantageous' and I was just amazed because it's also a word you don't hear very often. I was so surprised that I almost ran over my girlfriend trying to show her the paper like 'LOOK SOMEONE USED THIS WORD OMG!' And she's always complaining because she's an elementary school teacher and she spends most of her time poring over children's books. But yeah, it was a cool use of word."

And I sort of sat there like, "Uh... thank you? I feel special now..."

It's not so much I was flattered than I was more incredibly amused (on the inside of course) that my using a single word would get him all fired up enough to show the paper to his frickin' girlfriend.

I seriously love this man.

skibalovesya @ 2007-09-21T20:37:00

2007-09-22T00:37:54Z

Shhh... I'm updating from the Mac store. :D

skibalovesya @ 2007-09-14T20:57:00

2007-09-15T01:00:53Z

Time to play a game! If you see this, give it a shot -- it's pretty easy.

All you gotta do is guess the song and artist of the following lyric snippets. If you want to make your own, just put your iTunes or iPod on shuffle and pick your favorite line from the first 20 songs.

One rule: DON'T LOOK UP THE LYRICS -- THAT'S CHEATING. :P

1. "It's to Jimmy Eat World and those nights in my car, when the first star you see may not be a star -- I'm not your star."

2. ~~"It's driven me before, and it seems to have a vague, haunting mass appeal."~~ -- Incubus, Drive -- gotten by crimson_coat

3. ~~"Now there's only one solution, and of course you jump to conclusions, and you can count how much we owe you, but you just lost something much greater -- you just lost your best friend."~~ -- Reset, Friend -- gotten by schwing_sparkle

4. "The consequences that I've rendered; I've stretched myself beyond my means."

5. ~~"And I find it kind of funny, I find it kind of sad: The dreams in which I'm dying are the best I've ever had."~~ -- Gary Jules, Mad World -- gotten by myherodrowning

6. "Love lost was found, night turns to day."

7. ~~"She kisses everyone goodbye and waves her middle finger high -- they're never gonna mess with her again."~~ -- Sugarcult, Sayin' Goodbye -- gotten by boheme06

8. ~~"When I wake up here tomorrow, things will never be the same."~~ -- Simple Plan, Don't Wanna Think About You -- gotten by boheme06

9. "You're going away in late September, and here's the thanks for a summer I will always remember."

10. "And if I get a little blood on you, finally the world will know you're guilty."

11. ~~"You remind me of the times when I knew who I was. Still, the second hand will catch us, like it always does."~~ -- Story of the Year, Until the Day I Die -- gotten by myherodrowning

12. "It's my fault when you're blind. It's better that I see it through your eyes."

13. ~~"She broke my heart, I wanna be sedated -- all I wanted was to see her naked!"~~ -- Bowling For Soup, Girl All the Bad Guys Want -- gotten by boheme06

14. "Livin' with Louie-Dog's the only way to stay sane."

15. "It stuck in his craw that they made him retire at the age of sixty-five."

16. "Futari ga kitto deaeruyouna mahou wo kakette."

17. ~~"The only family that she's ever had was her seven horny brothers and a drunk-ass dad."~~ -- Sublime, Wrong Way -- gotten by fwing

18. "Still and transfixed, the electric sheep are dreaming up your fate."

19. "Sometimes it feels like I don't really know what's going on. Time and time again it seems like everything is wrong in here."

20. "Time that called for space, unclear of where you drew the line."

skibalovesya @ 2007-09-14T14:26:00

2007-09-14T18:27:41Z

"Hi, my name is Matt Betrand and I'm running for the '08 election. I believe that all people who want to get abortions should be brutally murdered. I am Matt Betrand and I approve of this message."
"Heyyyy, Matty..."

^ This is why I love Government.

skibalovesya @ 2007-09-12T22:37:00

2007-09-13T02:37:32Z

Again, another something I seriously need to squee about has come up.

This year, seniors are required to take either Government and Economics, or AP European History... obviously I chose Government. >_>;; But anyway. The teacher is this totally frickin' adorable newbie from Pawtucket named Matt Bertrand.

I kept noticing, however, that at odd intervals during his lectures (which are more like chitchat, as he's definitely the most easily distractable teacher ever), he'd make this odd facial tic -- he'd squint, wrinkle his nose, and kinda smirk -- or, usually when someone answered a question he posed completely wrong, his left eye would twitch in somewhat of a wink. Both are really pronounced, and I, being the ever-observant lil' thing I am, decided to ask him about it. Mostly because my brother kept asking me if the guy had Tourettes or something (my brother has him for World Cultures), and it got me rather curious.

So I ask him about it, and he looks pleasantly surprised -- probably the first time a student made a perceptive remark that didn't concern his age, which he's decided to keep under wraps just to annoy us -- and says he didn't really notice, but...

He proceeds to tell me that he was diagnosed with a mild form of Tourettes when he was a kid, but it had pretty much disappeared altogether.

Now, at this moment, I'm trying to repress the hugest, squee-tastic grin ever. Not only was I right about him having an actual tic (I had first dismissed it as just a reaction to annoyance), I absolutely adore people with Tourettes, no matter how mild. It all stems from a documentary I watched way too long ago that described a group of adorable little kids (between the ages of 5 and 12, I think) who all suffered from varying degrees of Tourettes. It was just the most precious thing EVER.

So as we said our goodbyes, I turn around and just grin like a fucking maniac. It was like the most amazing moment ever, because his cuteness was just exponentially increased by his once having Tourettes. I mean, eeeeeeee so very cute!!!

*siiiiiigh* And that was my most squee-filled moment of the day. :3

Though I do feel like he went home to his girlfriend and, giving her the saddest puppy face ever, asked, "I don't have any facial tics, do I? D: D: D:" Probably made the guy uber-self-conscious, but, then again, he seemed happy to tell me, and it more or less upped my love for him all around. XD;;

Also I need to find better synonyms for 'ever' and 'adorable.' x_x

skibalovesya @ 2007-09-05T23:49:00

2007-09-06T04:09:08Z

EDIT: Oh my, I seem to have forgotten a few things... *adds*

Allow me to gush while it is still fresh in my head.

I get there at about 4:30-ish, hoping to meet some idols, but they incidentally came around 3. So I walked around the building (avec ma mere) and found a random bus chillin' in the back. This security dude (short, dark, with a green shirt and a black goatee) hops out of it, so I ask him if the idols are around because I want to give Blake and Chris a copy of my Murtle doodle. Unfortunately he wasn't allowed to bring people out or in, so I gave him the pics to give to them. Not 100% sure if they got to them, but I hope so and I'm gonna ask Ethan if he can double check (we're facebook friends).

As we were sitting waiting, there was a text box displaying sent text messages. Someone said they loved Cake, so I knew we were in for a Cake-fan-filled time. I tried to send messages too but... I don't think I got the number correct. I couldn't see it. We were like, farthest away from the stage, but on the right side and somewhat angled at the stage. It was a decent vantage point but I couldn't make out any facial details. I just used the screens every so often, I more or less watched them actually onstage.

At the start of the show itself, the beginning part, some "security" guy is up onstage... couldn't see him very well, but then he turned and I saw his chin (it's kinda sad I could recognize him by his chin) and I figured out it was Blake in disguise. He whips off the hat, wig, and fake moustache, and ba-boom, showtime.

Yada yada, stuff, idols. Whee.

Then the boys formed a "band." Chris was teh drummahz and Blake was on guitar... spending quite a bit of time bouncing around stage near the drum kit.

Then there was more stuff. I don't remember the specific order, but at some point Phil and Sanjaya were going to do a "duet" and they start singing a capella "I Want It That Way." But in the middle of the first chorus, Sanjaya had a spaz attack and phil was like "PSYCH!"

I think Blake came out after that. Or some such. And he decided to do "She Will Be Loved" by first tracking a few drum beatboxes, then singing and playing guitar over them. Which totally kicked ass. He did somewhat similar with "Time of the Season" and it was most spectacular. ^_^

At some later point, he also did "You Give Love a Bad Name." And sometime after that, Chris was singing "This Love" and I think Blake popped up and I literally SCREAMED, "CAKE DUET OMG!!!"

Together they sang "Virtual Insanity" and it rocked the house. X3

After he was done singing, there was a beatbox-off. They started by playing a bit of ping-pong using only beatboxes (adorableness ensued). Then they actually had a little contest involving trying to get each side to scream louder (I was on Blake's side, but Chris called a tie). And they challenged each other to beatbox better (or something, I couldn't hear over the fangirl screams). Chris has gotten rather good. :D

That was pretty much it for Cake-related goodness.

Later that night, we left a little early (my mom was getting antsy and I was, quite frankly, a little bored...), and I went around back to the bus to check if Mr. Security Dude With Green Shirt was there. He wasn't, but I asked a different guy and he assured me that the pictures wouldn've gotten to them regardless. "They're good people," after all. XD;;

And that was my night! :D :D :D